The interviewers always ask the same thing - they did for college, for the IPRE, and plenty of interested individuals have asked after everything is over - “What made you want to learn transmutation magic?”
Taako knows the right answers, and there are plenty: reasons like finding the magic interesting, or natural inclination, or a love of learning.
He wonders what any of them would do with the honest answer. He watched his sister starve. He felt hunger like a horrible, clawing beast in the pit of his stomach and he didn’t know if either of them would live from one day to the next. No amount of genuine interest or natural skill could compete with fevered desperation. He exhausted his spell slots and he could not get it wrong. The two of them could not afford any less than perfection from him, and Taako would like to see any “rigorous” college program replicate that level of demand.
Taako knows they ask the same question of Lup. He knows that she doesn’t tell them about people bigger than them, looming and calculating, pulling on their arms and lurching towards them. Those aren’t the answers that anyone wants.
Nobody likes to think of the silly, goofy, vibrant twins as children who only just survived, day to day. So they don’t talk about it.
They don’t bring it up on the ship, not after cycles have passed and everyone on the crew has died at least once. Barry talks about why he decided to go into necromancy and Taako doesn’t comment. Merle chuckles when Lup and Taako both snipe at him about wasting food. Lucretia watches in interest as Taako sews a shirt back together for the fifth time instead of throwing it out, as Lup inventories the kitchen meticulously. The twins both scored exceptionally well on the survival aspect of IPRE testing, but sometimes Davenport forgets that, until they’re tracking down the light and he’s reminded. The twins don’t talk about it, but so much of who they are is made up of who they had to be to get the chance to grow up.
One cycle, there’s a world that never has enough food, and Taako and Lup fall into a routine that’s well-practiced. Spell slots are measured out daily, rests are scheduled, and Lup shows the crew how to preserve any extra food they find. Everyone is always hungry, but no one starves.
Taako hasn’t worked this long perfecting his transmutation magic to let any of his family starve.
(via taztaas)