Challenge #00692 - A327: “Secret” Identity
A character wakes up next to their spouse, ready to start their day. But… this person is not what they appear to be - what seems to be a normal person is just a disguise for their true self, a fearsome and powerful inhuman entity. The catch is that the spouse knows about this secretive disguise… but the entity doesn’t know the spouse knows, so still tries (a bit ineptly) to hide things. The spouse finds this too adorable to ruin the fun by revealing what they know just yet.
He always spent a few minutes in the morning just… lying in bed and watching him sleep. The love of his life. The most adorable human being in the universe. It was a miracle just to have him in the same house, let alone the same family.
It was very much a miracle that the breathlessly beautiful Bob Ballard had ultimately said ‘yes’ to nerdy nothing Melvin Mündané. never knowing that Melvin was secretly the courageous crusader Captain Charisma!
“I know you’re watching me sleep. Take a shower, look after yourself, and I’ll have eggs and sausage.”
“Eggs and sausage or eggs and sausage?” Melvin teased. The joke had been going on for five spectacular years.
"Breakfast, thank you. We have kids, next door.”
“You wanted to adopt,” Melvin pretended to whine. He loved it, of course. Bob and Melinda and Trey made the perfect family together. And Melvin made four.
They were his motivation, his reason to fight, his home to defend. And a blessing to go home to. And, on the rare occasions when he spent a whole day as Melvin Mündané, mild-mannered minion of MultiGloboCorp, they were his reason to smile.
The special ringtone went off.
“Drat,” he sighed. “Work needs me. ASAP. You’ll have to get your own breakfast, honey.”
“I hate that you’re on call,” Bob pouted.
“So do I. Hug the kids for me.”
“In excess.”
Melvin used a little of his super-speed to get ready, that morning, hiding his super-suit under his ordinary business one, and dashing out the door. Then it was up, up and away for another day of derring do.
*
Bob giggled. “He forgot the car, again,” he murmured. And he’d forgotten that super-fast drying left spatter all over the bathroom. And running out the door at fifty miles an hour tended to scatter the kids’ art.
Of course he knew that Melvin was Captain Charisma. Like his superhero moniker, Melvin wasn’t exactly mister subtle.
“Is Daddy saving the world again?” asked a sleepy and yawning Trey.
“Yep. And he’s going to beat the bad guys.”
For Bob, it was another day of being Da. But every moment was worth it. Even the spatter in the bathroom. He felt like the luckiest man alive.
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Challenge #00691 - A326: Photographic Anomalies
Somewhere in the universe…
[AN: Picture shows a “grey” alien striking a pose on a dirt road by a beach. In the far left background is a circled object in the sky. Said object is enlarged in the lower right of the frame. It resembles a Terran jet]
ALIENS?! blared the headline. The article expanded on the bizarre tale.
K’tob Nygrosk had no idea what would appear in her holiday snaps when she took them. “I was focussed on Reikik, not what was in the sky. I had no idea it was up there until my cousin Bubil pointed it out.”
Experts have examined the camera and K’tob’s negatives and found it to be a genuine anomaly. But they further posit that it could easily be a child’s toy or a kite piloted by fellow beach-goers in the background.
“There’s no sense of scale or means to compare size, let alone a metric for measuring its height,” stated Aeronautics Division Representative Yob K’doth. “The object is most likely a hobbyists attempt at a joke. Besides, everyone knows that a circular wing design is the most stable for flight. These ‘wings’ are preposterous and could not possibly be used for interstellar travel.”
Anomalous objects in the sky continue to appear. Many posit that they are aliens, come to analyse Y’kthikan life. Let’s hope they’re friendly.
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Challenge #00690 - A325: The Treasure
A Gyiik discovers the food Elvis ate.
Vic reached hungrily for the cellulose sheet.
“Ut,” said the Archivaas Tiel, drawing it back to her body. “Payment first. I know how you Gyiiks get with new recipes. I learned after the first time.”
“My apologies,” Vic the Gyiik began to lay out her money. “Two Months plus hazard pay… and a voucher card for two Years’ worth of free meals at Unsuitable Food Eat.”
Someone in the neighbouring booth whistled backwards. This was high-stakes stuff.
Archivaas Tiel slid over the single sheet.
Vic read in awe[1]. “A quarter cup of creamy peanut butter… that’s… milled peanuts, super-fine. Mm-hm. Eight slices of home-style white bread. Have to make that ourselves, no commission kitchen will do that any more… Mmmm… Two large bananas… yes… Eight… slices of bacon and two tablespoons… butter.” Vic read the method. “Sandwiches… then fried in the butter…” She looked up. “This man ate this as a snack?”
“Apparently.”
“Was he possessed by Kürmaan, the spirit of Famine?”
“No. He was just a big eater.”
“And he did not perish from a rupture of the stomach?”
“Drug abuse.”
Vic boggled. “Truly… humans are a dangerous species.”
[1] Recipe courtesy of Mr Food.
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Challenge #00689 - A324: In Peril
Always remember, if you can see it it already knows you are there.
Good news, this alien rock had enough breathable air to make resource gathering less of a problem.
Bad news, resource gathering was going to happen from the ground up. Literally.
Good news, the edible flora and fauna were easily identifiable.
Bad news… there was a human in the area.
Like K'tole, the human had landed here because of its plentiful resources very close to the surface. And all the fresh water and edible biota a cogniscent could desire.
K'tole was very glad of the thick underbrush, the first few times.
But the last time, K'tole was caught on a rocky mesa. Trying to gather ore with substandard tools. The human’s shadow passed her by. She froze. Hoping a lack of movement would fool its primitive mammalian eyes.
The shadow paused for a hearts-stopping length of time. Something made a noise against the stone that was K'tole’s only protection in this blasted mesa.
And then the shadow moved away.
K'tole regained her breath and her wits before she peeked over the black granite boulder to watch the human retreating.
It had left her a better tool.
Which meant that the human had known she was here this entire time. And had decided to help.
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Challenge #00688 - A323: Benevolent Anarchy
Just for shits and giggles, a Greater Deregulation that lives up to the name. Total meritocracy, ‘I don’t care what you do as long as you stay the Hell off my property’. In other words, a GD where ‘profit’ is equated not just to ‘money’, but also ‘personal freedom’. In other words, less Republican, more Libertarian.
Welcome to Greater Deregulation Nor-Northwest. No freeloaders.
Kell the Hitcher helped unload the cargo. This was as far as the freighter captain would take her. And she knew about all the other Deregulations.
She’d expected a pall of smog and near-slaves populating most of the planet to support a few in their excess.
She boggled to see clean, wide streets and a happy populace. No need for bars on windows. No need for the bristling weapons of other Deregulations. The power came from the sun and the wind. And some geothermal plants in the active volcanic zones, but those were very far away from the main spaceport.
Spaces between the brick-and-mortar shops were taken up with little barrows of small-time business people. And very cunning ones who did not directly compete with their more solidly-established hosts.
Shops that sold clothing, for example, had at least one accessories barrow outside. And a barrow that made beverages. And someone selling some local delicacy.
What really surprised Kell was that none of these hucksters were barking for her attention, business, or money. They watched her. Some displayed their wares. Some showed off with the art of making.
Only the performers were allowed to make noise. Something that, according to the tourists’ handbook, was reached by mutual agreement.
The free market was actually free.
Corporations could do as they wished, but so could the buying public. Corporate records were public records. So if any corporation was weighed and found wanting… the public abandoned them.
Which was why the waterways were clean, the air was clear, and everyone had access to information.
There were no schools, just people who wished to educate, handing out their knowledge via the info-nets. And getting paid by the people who viewed it.
There was a medical system. Publicly funded and looking astonishingly like free health care. People passing by the hospitals or medical centres just… absently tipped their pocket change into a donation bucket for the greater good.
Kell picked a park and a nice-looking spot and set up her shingle. Stories told, donations welcome.
It was going to be interesting to see how this one had got it right.
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Challenge #00686 - A321: Peripatetic Commerce
Local union meeting for the owners of Little Shops That Weren’t There Yesterday, And Are Gone When You Try To Go Back, Local 37.
“Any new business?”
One hand went up. A relatively young hand in a forest of otherwise weird old people.
“Yes?”
“Who, where or when are we local to, exactly?”
Half the union assembled there groaned.
"Local is an artificial concept, but if you want actual co-ordinates…”
The entire meeting room filled with the chorus, “The Virgo Supercluster, Section two five five of the Milky Way, Galactic supercluster seven five two, Mundis Mundis Universe…”
The younger hand went up again. “And… if someone… accidentally wandered into Kasterborous?”
The meeting went downhill from there.
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The Q&A Session of Genghis Khan!
Genghis Khan rises from the dead, and gently and politely corrects some misconceptions about his history, personality, etc.
(#00685 - A320)
There were several big surprises when Gengis Khan returned from the dead. Not the least of which being that he was average height for a man of his time.
He was muscular, well-groomed, and quite brown… yet he looked as much at ease in a modern business suit as he should have in horse-hides and furs. He did not have a single weapon on him, but the very air was thick with threat.
The interviewer on Good Morning China did her utmost to avoid recoiling from him every time he leaned in to flirt with her.
“As you can see, I am only short in retrospect. As was Napoleon, I believe. The truth is, nobody documented my dimensions because nobody thought they were worth noting. The rumours of dwarfism are obviously an attempt to posthumously -ah- belittle me. Haha.”
“Haha,” echoed the host. “And the other rumours? Of your ruthlessness?”
“Utter nonsense. The people of my time respected a show of might. I played to the audience. But the real truth is, if someone had the skill and cunning to come close to killing me? I made them one of my generals, and faced that skill and cunning towards my enemies. Far more productive in the long run. A true meritocracy values those with skill and drive.”
“What about invading Persia?”
“It was my duty as khan to see that those who threatened my peaceful envoys never did so again. It was, to use a modern phrase, super effective.” Gengis smiled. He had amazingly clean and straight teeth.
“And the forty million deaths?”
“I was a warlord. Death was my business. Happily, war and death are no longer necessary, this time.”
“This time?”
“Yes. I’m going into business.”
Such a simple statement. But it drove fear into the hearts of millions. And yet… Mongocorp was surprisingly benevolent once it gained ultimate control.
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The Hunt Begins!
The Rabbit Women of Solares IV begin their Great Hunt! (for carrots, Earth-Men mates, Bugs Bunny memorabilia, what-have-you.)
(#00684 - A319)
Nobody saw the invasion coming. Well. Almost nobody. Make that ‘nobody who counts in the greater social milieu’ because Professor Cocomilia was largely viewed as a crank.
His theories about Lapinoids had been the stuff of geek comedy for years. As were his increasingly agitated attempts to warn the public.
And then came Invasion Day.
They were seven-foot-tall amazons with huge muscles and even huger mammaries. Their armour and weaponry was far superior to anything that Earth had in stock. They were formidable. They were unstoppable.
…and they were surprisingly willing to pay for any kind of merchandise that featured a rabbit.
When the bulk of the Terran population noticed that they were all female… That’s when the trouble really started.
The furries came out of the woodwork. Not the friendly kind, not the ones who had fun dressing up like animals. And definitely not the ones who just admired anthropomorphic animals.
No. The ones who came to throw themselves at the Lapinoids’ collective feet were the ones who gave the rest of the furries a bad name. The basement-dwelling, self-entitled, porn-generating weirdoes who were one crucial step away from bestiality.
And they were the ones who gave humanity a bad name.
Which was when humanity found out that all of Professor Cocomilia’s ravings were right on the mark.
Especially about them being carnivorous.
Humanity in general and furries in particular were more than willing to let the Lapinoids slaughter the 'bad examples’. But when they moved on to the more 'normal’ throng…
Well…
That was when Jennifer 'Hoppie’ Rodriguez found her time to shine. Her fursuit resembled the Lapinoids in almost every degree but height. She was the one who managed to negotiate for peace with a mixture of dance, pantomime, broken Lapinae, broken English, and a little bit of song.
The Lapinoids were so grateful that they gave her custom-fitted diamond armour and a life-size statue of herself, in costume, made of gold.
Because everyone knows that carats are a bunny’s best friend.
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Challenge #00683 - A318: Different Perspective
Free prompt! This ticket entitles the writer to do any daily drabble that just needs to be written, and may be used out of sequence.
[AN: The following is a preview of sorts for my book-in-progress, Kung Fu Zombies. However the point of view presented may not appear in the book. Essentially, I’m cleansing my mental palette]
If she wanted to be kind, E would say that Aiden astonished her. Amazed, confounded and confused. Maybe even a little bit of surprise.
But really?
When she got down to it?
She didn’t much want to be kind.
Especially in moments like now.
It was a mall. Like many other malls post-plague, survivors were progressively raiding it for anything that seemed or was deemed useful. Some animals were inhabiting it already. A burst pipe lead the underground parking lot to become flooded. Which meant that many animals were coming for the water. Including some fish from the mall’s fountains. They’d landed there, evidently, when some idiot had set off ordinance in the middle of a crowd.
E had told everyone to be careful in this mall. The army’s last-ditch efforts had made everything way more difficult than it had to be.
She’d told everyone twice.
And she’d made sure to tell Aiden five times, because he was exactly that kind of person.
She should have gone for a sixth.
“Oh. My. God,” whispered Torque. She pointed. “You need to step up your game, love.”
E tried to sight along Torque’s arm. “What are you talking abo–?” That double-cursed idiot kid…
Aiden had actually strapped a noisemaker to his left arm with a piece of the duct tape she’d specifically told him to hold in reserve for emergencies. Was he going to make a career out of not listening to her?
And he was headed straight for the pit that lead to the new and improved goldfish pond in the basement.
And the dangling light fixture that could not possibly hold his weight.
Oh great. “This is another idiot plan to ‘impress me’,” she sighed.
Torque made realistic vomiting motions and sounds.
“Yeah, I know. Come on. Let’s go save his sorry ass.”
“Why?”
“Bait like that, you don’t let die all at once.”
“Meh, good enough.”
They were careful, as always, getting to a place of strategic advantage. But Aiden made them rush. So they made sure they stayed on areas they knew were stable.
Neither she nor Torque wanted to make the other watch them die. And they had the extra advantage of Aiden’s show drawing all the Infected straight for him.
Which was a considerable disadvantage if they wanted him to survive for very much longer.
…which was a point of some debate, back at the Fort.
He was an annoying, whiny, self-centred ass who couldn’t see the facts in front of his face. But, dammit, he was super-effective at what he did.
Which generally manifested as falling into the midden and coming out with a shiny gold ring.
E arrived with Torque, careful to stay where most of the Infected couldn’t climb, weapons ready and watching for trouble. And they arrived just in time to see Aiden leap for the cable.
He did not swing, which would have been the stupidest move, ever. He did not climb, which would have been a move in the top ten.
No. He clung to it like it was his last hope… and transferred the noisemaker from his arm to the cable of the light fixture. Then he grinned at her like he had just solved all the world’s problems.
The Infected going after the noise fell down the gaping hole and into the flooded basement.
Torque got comfortable on their mutual perch, a tank that had fallen victim to the slings and arrows of outrageous misfortune. E followed her lead. They watched the show for five minutes and then E signed, “Great work. How are you going to get out of there?”
His face was a book with large print. It said, Uhm…
“How long can you hold on?” Torque signed.
Aiden looked like he suddenly needed to go to the bathroom.
“You’re right, he’s so entertaining,” Torque whispered.
E snorted and got out her rope. It was good rope. The kind rock-climbers used to protect themselves from falling. It didn’t make the best lasso, but it could be tied to a wire coat hanger.
Good old wire coat hangers. They were like enormous paperclips. And there were always times when you really needed a piece of bendable wire.
Aiden’s ignorant grin came back as he realised what she was doing. He got ready to catch the hanger.
It was a simple enough process. Especially because Aiden had finally absorbed the repeated lesson on not swinging on things that weren’t designed to hold a human’s weight. They carefully pulled him closer to their perch. And he carefully eased further down the cable so that he could be closer.
And, when the time was right, she and Torque helped him on to the tank.
“That was almost suicidal,” she admonished in a whisper. “Don’t do it again.”
“Had to improvise,” he murmured, “They were between me and the levis.”
And then there were times like this. When he was super-effective at being blindingly selfish.
“Kill him later,” advised Torque. “We have a shopping list and he’s an extra pair of arms.”
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Challenge ##00682 - A317: Strange Camouflage
Pic prompt!
[Picture shows a tree that has grown around some war debris. The most prominent piece resembles a stick insect.]
It was another ghost world. Cheryl hated ghost worlds. There was always a chance, a slim and gut-wrenching chance, that there were survivors, somewhere far away from the relics of past civilisation. Bombed back to the stone age. Or further.
Nomadic gatherer-hunters were hard to find with orbital scanners.
There weren’t many buildings standing, any more. Forests had come to reclaim what was once a city. Some animals wandered and grazed where there used to be streets. Introduced Terran fauna that had gone wild.
Lilly broke the silence. “The war must’ve really dragged on,” she said in a low murmur.
“What makes you say that?” Cheryl asked in kind.
Lilly pointed. This tree, like many others around it, had swallowed shrapnel and hardware. But a collection of wires and straight pieces and gears… moved.
It was a phasmid. A stick insect.
Which meant two things.
The war on this planet had broken out almost instantly… and had carried on throughout most of deep time. Enough time for the insects to mimic that which they found everywhere.
Cheryl was suddenly very glad that life suits were proof against projectile weapons.
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