Nature hated -for various reasons- vacuums, the teeny tiny screws that keep eyeglasses together, common language assembly instructions with clear diagrams, people who asked questions with answers that tempted fate, and space vessels named Enterprise.
Hevun’s Ambassador. Available February 14th, 2014
Ullyully uxinfree.
(Source: boburnhamdaily, via carpet-bags-and-flying-bunn-blog)
ow
ow
owowowowow
puns hurt
I am going to send every one of these to my brother one text message at a time and see how furious he is by the time he gets home
Grooooooooooooooooooan
SCREAMS
WHY DOES EVERYONE HATE PUNS PUNS ARE THE HIGHEST FORM OF HUMOR THIS IS A FACT
All of these would make eggcellent yokes!!!!
(via callmegallifreya)
Pax Industrius - InterNutter - Steam Powered Giraffe, MASH (TV) [Archive of Our Own]
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
For the two people who actually responded to the post about my botfic.
Everyone else is banned forever ;) [JK, you’re not banned. Go ahead and read it. I don’t mind]
Smashwords – It Happened One Wednesday —a book by C M Weller
My Christmas present to all of my followers.
With a side of love to Rod Serling, wherever he may be.
i can cut a piece of wood in half just by looking at it
it’s true i saw it with my own eyes
oh my god
(via a-spoon-is-born)
Only thing I’m worried about pulling off is my earrings ‘cause we’re fighting bitch
lol classic :D
(via femme-and-furious)
Sahra was on the opposite side of the station to Ore Processing when it blew up. She, like all the other tunnel rats, closed her hands over her ears and stayed rigidly stock still until the echoes died down. Alarms, shrill and piping to human ears, were still filling the air with their near-musical noise.
She knew what to do. Follow procedure, and maybe nobody would get hurt.
No smoke in the air. Good. She had to take herself and as many other tunnel rats to the nearest checkpoint. Sahra re-oriented herself and hollered, “Ullyully uxinfree!” At the top of her lungs. Human code for ‘come out of hiding and follow me, I know the way’.
Important things had to be communicated quickly or they wouldn’t be communicated at all.
Sahra crawled slow and patient, hollering, “Ullyully uxinfree!” At every tunnel seam. Those following her, big or small, joined the chorus once they were on her tail.
Once out, they lined up with their carts disconnected from their body-harnesses, neatly by their left sides. Sitting down with their ankles tucked under their bottoms and their hands on their heads. They had to remain that way until a supervisor got to them and told them what to do.
Disobedient slaves got shot.
Hevun’s Rebel. Available soon in all good eBook stores everywhere.
The info-station squawked and sputtered, making half her family jump.
“…blow for freedom,” said the low voice of someone. “our agents… (sizz) …victorious.”
Everyone was looking at everyone else. Sahra sat there with her mouth open and her hands pressed flat on the table. She’d never heard anything like this before. No-one was allowed to get up without Mama or current-Papa’s say-so. It was the rules.
“Tonight… (whreeee) …ore processing centre, killing… (dattledadattle) …oppressors including the vicious freak known as Eon. Celebrate, for tonight our…. (hiss) …struck at the heart of the Majestrix herself.”
“Someone turn that off,” said Mama.
“(swowr) …been known that the decadent… (zzwish) …entertained herself in base ways with the shape-shifter–”
Seventh-Papa stretched over and pulled a wire out. The info-station gave a final shriek and fell silent.
Chills played up and down her spine.
“What wuz that?” Sahra asked.
“(cough-spongebrain-cough),” managed Darvan. Then he smiled and said, “Excuse me. Gristle.”
Mama puckered her mouth at him, but did no more.
“Just a bunch of idiots tryin’ to change the natural order,” said Seventh-Papa. “Pay it no mind. All of you.”
“But he said they were the ones blowed up ore proc'ssing…”
“Butts are for smacking if some little girls don’t shut their mouths. We didn’t hear nothing about nothing. Understand?”
Sahra tried to think of a better way to protest that didn’t start with a ‘but’, and had to shut her mouth. “Yes’m,” she lied.
She watched the rest of her family eat while she filled up on water. Seventh-Papa knew something he wasn’t telling. Mama knew more. And she was scared. The elder sibs knew enough to be scared, too. Except Darvan.
Coming soon to all good eBookstores everywhere. Hevun’s Rebel.
Got your copy yet?
Sahra stuck to the path the Masters had set her, wincing a little at the sharp bits she couldn’t work loose and into her cart. There was no light. Sahra expected none and was more than used to finding her way around by feel.
The inside of this tunnel was sharp and crumbly. It hurt her fingers to scrabble it loose on the floor, but it was better than hurting her knees and legs crawling over it. It smelled of old fire and didn’t echo at all. Not even when she gave a whoop to see if anyone else was near.
The answering whoops were small and far off.
Sahra yelped and crashed halfway down a slope that the masters had not put on their map. She spent a heart-stopping minute sorting out which bits were tangled in what before managing to crawl up the gritty, stinging slide.
Some of her finds were falling out her cart. Damn it. But she didn’t want to go fetching if they had half a chance of falling back out again and the masters wanted this done quick.
She’d come back on a free-range day. Yeah. And take her time. And beg for knee pads.
Sahra froze. Something outside the sloping tube was making a noise. Not like water pouring. Like… sand and scrattle and someone making bubbles in their drink… all mixed up. And something knocking. In a pattern Sahra didn’t understand.
Her heart tried to leap out of her chest as she realized she was alone in the dark with something on the outside of her hidden place trying to get in. Something neither human nor master.
This Halloween… send someone you love Hevun’s Rebel. Available soon in all good eBook stores everywhere.