Challenge #02940-H017: But My Rep…
A: Was that you wife?
B: Don’t question it
A: But
B: Don’t
A: Why burrito?
B: What did I just say?! – Anon Guest
It had been a typically Human conversation between spouses. As in, completely incomprehensible to outside observers. Including the final words, “Bye, babe. I gotta go burrito the babies.”
Companion Gren couldn’t not ask. An exchange that finished with Human Ben attempting to focus on her work while Companion Gren waited patiently for Ben to crack. Patient and anticipatory silence was Human Ben’s weak spot. Every time she checked Gren or looked hir way, Gren was very visibly waiting patiently.
It took twenty minutes. Humans did not like silence. “You really want to know, don’t you? You really want to find out about this. I can warn you, it won’t match whatever you’ve been imagining for the past half hour.”
[Be sure to visit internutter (dot) org for a link to the rest of this story, and details on how to support this artist. Or visit peakd (dot) com (slash at) internutter for the stories at their freshest]
Challenge #02936-H013: A Buggy Plan
Human Arn took in the supreme effort Frip had already gone through in order to create this environment and was already calculating the paperwork inherent in getting it off the planet Earth.
“I am in sooooo much trouble,” sighed Human Arn.
This quote is from this prompt from ages ago. https://peakd.com/fiction/@internutter/challenge-02771-g214-a-few-minor-obstacles
Human Arn looked at all the paperwork they’ve managed to get through and all that still had to get done and shook their head. Not much longer now. SO many studies on the animals, on ensuring there would be no invasive species problems, on ensuring they really were havenworlder safe for as huge a swath of the population as possible, and all the rest of the regulations the Alliance had for the sake of safety and the transport of animals. It was only when all the i’s were dotted and t’s were crossed, that they could give Frip the news. – Anon Guest
It helped that the insects had a special diet. It helped that they had specific environmental needs. It meant that, should the containing terrarium break or otherwise leak, the escapees were less likely to become a problem. There was still a study of cloned beetles inside artificial environments meant to simulate key features of stations and ships throughout the alliance. This included some structures made of sucrose and cellulose.
Since it wasn’t eucalyptus-flavoured, the cloned insects refused to eat anything there. It was one of the toxins so dire that nothing else wanted to touch it. That was a good thing. At least as far as Frip was concerned. There was, however, one bad thing about it all.
“The good news is that you can take them home,” Human Arn began. “The bad news is that you have to do it by reducing the terrarium to the size of a standard sleep pod instead of a small room.”
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Challenge #02586-G029: A Friend of a Friend
We love, we protect, and we only want you to carry our own with you when you escape. Please, please, take our tiniest and most vulnerable with you when we sacrifice ourselves for an exit (X1000% if it’s our pets, who can’t even deal with the galaxy we brought them into) —HUMANKIND c/- Protection
“You lot go on, I’ll catch up. Just do me a solid, okay? Make sure Tibbles is safe with you.” Human Fil was torn between what they planned to do and the promise they needed in order to do it.
“Tibbles will be safe with us,” vowed Gork, even though Human Fil’s phlegmatic pet lizard scared five colours of crap out of them. It set off every single one of Gork’s instinctual hazard alerts. Nevermind that the creature had two modes - slow and slower - it felt to Gork like it was a three-Siwu[1] package of concentrated threats.
The Human had told the Last Lie, and the ship was falling apart around them, but Gork kept their word. They got together three of Human Fil’s best friends and gathered up lizard, terrarium, bed and toys. No matter how creepy its skin nor constant its gaze nor unnerving its flicking blue tongue was. The sacrifice did not include the most vulnerable that Human Fil had pack-bonded with.
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Challenge #02385-F195: How Lucky
A scientific analysis crew of aliens hire a human bodyguard. The human has a strange power over fauna, as in they become friendly/borderline domesticated like earth pets. The human is confused as it’s happened in many planets/stations. Meanwhile the scientists are having trouble between making sure to get the data and making sure the human stays on as a permanent crew member. – Anon Guest
It is a known rule of the universe that Humans will attempt to pet anything. Humans may also attempt to tame anything that crosses their path. They’re a friendly species, and spread their pack-bonding to any creature that responds to them. Many are willing to fail at the attempt.
One is more successful than most Humans. They have a knack for interacting with non-cogniscent creatures beyond that which should be logically plausible. They went by Human Stu (because they were ‘cookin’, they said) and spent a contracted twelve years with the crew of the Non-invasive Probe. Twelve years spent capturing, examining, and releasing every single creature the crew could find on a planet in orbit around TGD-WE4-876.
Human Stu was there to keep the scientific analysts safe from the creatures on the planet they were surveying. They chose to do so by being unbelievably friendly with every single one. Humankind were immune to any venoms and poisons on that planet, but no such venomous creatures attempted to harm them. They were friendly right back in return. It was uncanny.
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Challenge #02154-E325: She’s Still a Pup
[NAME] winced slightly. “It’s a dog, Major. A companion animal.”
“Looks like a class 3 bio engineered weapon to me!” – Anon Guest
The creature was huge. Even sitting down, it was almost as tall as a human. It was almost as wide as a human. Only the wagging tail distinguished it from a Terran bear. That, and the lolling tongue, dripping saliva as the animal panted. The human by its side agitated some fur by a nub that could have been an ear. The animal made a grumbling noise that sounded content.
“It’s not gengineered. This baby is naturally bred,” said the Human.
Major glared at it. “From a gengineered creature?”
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Challenge #02125-E296: Inside, Outside — Steemit
It was a good life. Thingone and Thingtwo agreed. Plenty of warm spaces. Lots of nice food. Halls to have a good rumpus up and down. Furniture, especially, to scramble up, down, into, out of, and under. The only thing missing was the world outside the windows. No matter how they howled and yowled to be allowed to play with the birds, their Feedme refused to open doors and let them outside.
This was a good thing only sometimes, when the weather was cold and the hated water fell from the grey sky. It was a bad thing most times, when the sun shone and the birds paraded their arrogance in front of them, knowing that neither Thingone nor Thingtwo could do what cats did best.
There were mice. There were rats. There were sometimes spiders and quick-legged geckoes. They just weren’t the same as the forbidden, tempting, and doubtlessly tasty birds. Thingone and Thingtwo sat on windowsills and contemplated the feathery temptation, chattering in disappointment at not being able to pass the invisible barrier and capture the arrogant little sods.