Challenge #01767-D306: The Double Feature Picture Show
Humans watch an alien horror movie featuring the humans as the monster – TheDragonsFlame
The idea of genre is nothing new. The idea of Horror is something uniquely human that took off in various forms around Galactic Society. An entertainment designed to scare, but not scare badly. Or to be really bad at scaring, depending on your point of view. It was a means by which Havenworlders could toughen up their genes and join larger and larger areas of Galactic Society.
And since it was a human genre, the humans eventually found what Galactic Society had done to it. Which lead to a re-revival of the movie theatre, since most of the genre were in non-holographic format.
Rael wasn’t in it to study humans. If you asked anyone, they would have said that he understood humans too well. He was in it for the popcorn, and to potentially stop Ambassador Shayde before she happened to anyone else. And right now, she was enjoying a Gyiik-sized bucket of a concoction called poppycock. A mixture of popcorn, nuts, butter toffee, and random treats that Nik had taken to like an amphibian to water. And, Rael had to grudgingly admit, it was more or less the food of the non-existent gods, as far as his metabolism was concerned.
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Challenge #01554-D093: A Rovin’ Heart
“Scrounger” Noun, a person or being who collects discarded objects and turns them into (a) ready cash. (b) something useful - often re-purposed. – @knitnan
Tolerance is a wonderful thing, and more of it happens on the relatively lawless edges of society than it does in the lawful middles. Law likes to build a bubble around itself and eliminate everything that exists outside of it. But edges… edges are where interesting things happen. Sometimes, it’s a plummet into destruction, but other times… you get interesting flights into strange new areas of potential.
And it’s the edge stations where Humans could interact with Galactic Citizens before they were accepted into Galactic Society as mostly harmless. Such as Peripatetic Matthew, a wanderer who may or may not have begun the Loyal Order of Hitchhikers, but definitely gleaned rides to a Spacer’s next survivable stop along the Edge Territories. Matthew would bring a small amount of cargo to stow into odd places and introduced quite a large number of freighter captains to the concept of luggage tetris.
But that wasn’t all that Peripatetic Matthew did.
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Challenge #01453-C358: The Urban Human
An alien naturalist, performing a David Attenborough-style documentary on Earth.
Potential sequel: As above, but replace “David Attenborough” with “Steve Irwin”. – @shkspr1048
[AN: Sorry I’m so late, dear readers. Yulemas shopping spree]
“And this… is the average human population density of the planet Terra.” The image showed the interior of a shopping mall on a slow hour. Humans populous enough to get in each others’ way if they were determined to do so, but not enough to be in each others’ way no matter what. “Of course, there are areas with lower populations.” The image of a human by the doorway of an isolated house in the middle of an empty plain. “And others with higher populations.” Rush hour in Japan. But we are focussing on the most common human density level - suburbia.“ An image from far above a suburban sprawl of houses, backyards, and intricately-winding roads. "Here, in our hide, we watch the humans go about their day-to-day lives without fear of disturbing them. These are deathworlders, and they are prone to anger.”
A fast-forward shot of sunrise effecting the landscape outside a window. “Humans operate by means of an invented time system. Regardless of the length of daylight in their area, many do not show activity for hours.”
The view slowed down to watch a pair of humans pass by, walking along the empty boulevards.
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Challenge #01448-C353: Long-term Effects of Stupid Decisions
“In a fit of rage, he got extremely scientific.”
Tour guide at the Oregon Vortex, possibly describing Stanford Pines. – @recklessprudence
“He employed every sensing device available, in the place where horses refused to go,” said the guide. “And more than a few that he invented himself. Results were confounding, to say the least. Keep in mind that this occurred in the early twenty-first century, well before post-Shattering complete scanners. He had to collate and calculate his data on his own.”
The effort, according to the guide, took months. During which, the investigator took more readings to feed into analytical programs of his own design.
After two years of solid work on this anomaly, he was left almost exactly where he started. All he had was a pile of data and no idea what it meant. It went entirely against everything he knew… and this was a man who studied outlier phenomenon.
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Challenge #01443-C348: Mrs Widgery’s Guests
Morris Dancers! To the tune of “Mrs Widgery’s Lodger”. – Anon Guest
[AN: For anyone wondering what the flying heck - here you go. I apologise in advance for the mental trauma.]
There were white-clad humans wearing bells on their shins. Each one carried a large, white kerchief in each hand. Except for the one of them that was wrestling an accordion into submission.
The ones with the kerchiefs were skipping about, legs ringing, to the slow and grinding tune.
“What are they doing?” said B'kizz.
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Challenge #01437-C342: Bringing Home Strays
It is common knowledge that humans crave companionship from cats and dogs. But one day the human rescues a pest animal, insisting the creature is their new companion. – Anon Guest
The human pack-bonding instinct is a strong one. Always be certain that your human isn’t bringing unwanted creatures back to your vessel with it. - From Every Cogniscent’s Guide to Human Care and Maintenance.
Something in the human’s vacation clothes was moving.
“Dee?” warned Kla'kish. “Have you found a pet?” Pet, pronounced, unexpected vector of trouble, anxiety, and abject terror amongst my fellow crewmembers.
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Challenge #01436-C341: Bizarre Reactions
Dinosaurs in zero g – OohLookShiny
Of all the things evolution in space has wrought, of all the new species discovered in long-abandoned space stations… This one definitely took the cake.
They started as small pterosaurs, and their prey were some kind of bipedal herbivore. Like all saurians, they also had feathers. There was also an ample supply of cockroaches, as well as the plants that had once been in the agri section and had since gone wild.
Everything had gone wild.
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Challenge #01434-C339: Pack Bonding is Strange
Someone who doesn’t understand all the hoopla over puppies and kittens gets a more unconventional pet and loves it to pieces – OohLookShiny
I’m not everyone. They say everyone feeds the Skitties on the sly. I don’t. They say everyone will say ‘hello’ to a dog or coo over a kitten or a puppy. I don’t.
I mean, sure, they’re cute and all, but… I’m just not into them. I’ve heard all the arguments, by the way.
“Humans are pack animals…” Yeah sure. And my crew understands that. I get me some good haptic feedback on board and I see the Therapists during shore leave for the mating instincts. I’m fine.
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Challenge #01351-C256: You Try to Teach Them…
Corvids. Just… Corvids. (link)
(btw did you know all modern corvids are descended from Aussie ancestors? Well, technically Australasian ones, but close enough) – @recklessprudence
Ravens are widely recognised as one of the more intelligent birds on the planet Earth. Substantial evidence for this includes the fact that they have learned how to tame humans.
Humans tend to object to that minor fact. They will go on endlessly about how they were the ones to teach corvids how to communicate in their language, and how they were the ones who observed them using tools, or playing with human artifacts. Or how they realised that corvids knew about trade.
The simple fact of life remains that humans have been doing all this work and building all this cool stuff and ravens have been slouching around and taking advantage of things like human expansion.
Challenge #01170-C075: A Steep Learning Curve
@callmegallifreya - have a twofer. And some Fridge Sadness.