applejackart:

*crying* 

Another internet has been won.

(via callmegallifreya)

scificity:

Never stops to be thanked
http://scificity.tumblr.com

[Reblogging to show MeMum]

The OP has not only won an internet, and unlimited cookies, but also the dubious honour of me nicking their idea wholesale for an impending fanfic.

…yay…

(via scificity)

I swear to Glob, this is what every single sports commentary or conversation sounds like to me. Minus the laughing, of course.

On the 21st of December, 2012…

I want to have a pair of portable speakers that hook up with my iPhone 4.

And on the stroke of midnight…

I will walk the darkened streets with the speakers (and phone) over my head blasting “Still Alive” on loop until someone either gets the joke or makes me stop.

[But I’ll probably sleep through it, alas.]

Better Be Meta: writingkills:Writer: I’ve planned and plotted this novel. I know...

writingkills:

Writer: I’ve planned and plotted this novel. I know what’s going to happen, and I know my characters like the back of my hand.

Main character: Lol no

Writer: What - what are you doing. You aren’t supposed to do that.

Main character: wanna do it

Side character: hey you…

Reblogging for total GPOY

(Source: bisexualpiratequeen, via betterbemeta)

This is really a joke, okay?

• Republican #1: Those (expletive deleted) Democrats are cheating to win the election!
• Republican #2: How can you know for sure?
• Republican #1: Because we cheated our asses off and they're *still* winning!

Best. Belly laugh. Ever.

I have an in-joke with my progeny we call “the Fartarsing Competition” which is generally aimed at any kind of road-building activity that’s mostly inactivity designed to impede traffic flow for months on end. You know. Road works.

On our way home from an outing, today, I decided to narrate the local crew allegedly doing something in regards to drainage.

Me: [Bad David Attenborough impression] “We now join the inaction in progress. I see five gentlemen standing around having a gassbag, one fellow wandering around the area of alleged construction and three gentlemen standing around supervising his aimless meanderings. And, yes, there is a gentleman sitting in the shade having a *biscuit*. Excellent fartarsing all around, gentlemen.”

Mayhem: [Perfect Announcer Voice] “And now… Ducks.”

ROFL.

I was laughing so hard my eldest was pleading with me to pull over lest we crash. He had such perfect timing, such a perfect nonsequiteur…

It was art.

missworded:

It was suggested to me by a brilliant friend that this version might be better. Enjoy Oompa Mitt!

Reblogging for MeMum… And the lols.

(via the-gay-is-over9000)

Rules of Australia

Every now and again, I come up with rules that my country seems to follow.

This is one of them.

If a vessel is left alone for any significant portion of time, it will have a spider in it.