Another village, another attempt at keeping the Bail Fund intact for another fortnight. This time, at least, La’ming Ton was there to help keep the twins in rein.
Allegedly.
“I’ll have your strongest ale,” said Koko.
“He’s having a mild cider shandy[1],” said La’ming. She wheeled to face Lulu, “And so are you, young miss.”
Lulu switched to Street Elven, “These are Humanmen, they can’t possibly know.”
“Elves already have a reputation for being duplicitous, deceptive lawbreakers. The last thing we need to enforce that reputation. So you two under-age Elves are drinking shandies. End of.”
The twins grumbled, but suffered to drink shandies.
Raucous laughter erupted from a card table across the inn.
“That’s what I like to see,” roared the most obnoxious one. “Tame Elves.”
One of his lieutenants laughed even louder and said, “Rather see ‘em hangin’ in a ‘pothecary to dry!”
“Hey, hey. Careful. They can hear us,” said another lieutenant. “With ears like that, they can hear your hand!”
The twins were growling under their breaths. La’ming, with her ears docked and her disguise on, rested a hand on one each of theirs. “Okay,” she said in Street Elven, “Now is the time we run the kind of scam where we let them walk home in their breechclouts.”
The twins turned to assess the quartet of boozy card players. “We have three… We could run the Winterheim Two-step.”
“I was thinking of the Passholdt Handshake.”
“How about somewhere in-between? The Goldcliff Warm Welcome.”
The twins grinned like sharks. “Goldcliff. I like it.”
La’ming sighed. “I don’t know whether it’s more disturbing that I know what all those are… or that you do.”
The game, known to hustlers as the Goldcliff Warm Welcome, was also known as skin the guys who are going to learn better. It began with La’ming airing a little more cleavage and hiking up more than a mere corner of her skirt.
The twins insisted on speaking only in Gutter Elven, a language that La’ming insisted was their twin talk. She also gave them the story that the twins were found wild and didn’t understand Common. A ‘fact’ that emboldened the Humanman quartet to be louder and more boisterous than they had been before.
It took only a few hours to rid them of every coin they had on them, all their jewelry, every single weapon in their possession, and most of their clothing. They were also getting the message but, as Koko and Lulu gathered up the spoils, Koko had to twist the knife.
“Just so you know,” he said to their astonished and gaping faces. “It’s really bad luck to insult an Elf.”
La’ming hurried them out of there and back to the safety of the Circus campgrounds. Haul and all. There, she made the twins vow that they wouldn’t leave the grounds until the Circus left with them.
Three weeks later, when they left for another town, La’ming noticed that her savings jar was a lot more full than she knew it had been a mere week ago. Of course she confronted her adopted kids the instant she found it.
“Did you two have anything to do with the extra coin in my restoration fund?”
“Depends,” said Koko. “Are you mad about it?”
Lulu elbowed him. Hissed a stop-talking noise with some urgency.
La’ming took a breath. Parenting these two was a constant negotiation. “I’d only be mad if you took any risks. Like going into the town when I told you it was dangerous. Especially going into the town without an escort to make sure you’re,” not arrested, “safe.”
“We never left the circus grounds,” said Lulu truthfully.
“We gave all that stuff we skinned off’a those dudes to Monty so he could hock ‘em for us,” added Koko. “And we put all of it into your jar.”
“No Elf should have their ears docked,” said Lulu. “It’s painful and limits expression and…” her voice fell to a mumble, “…’n’ I read of how it can cause problems in y’r dome piece…”
They could have blown all that coin on fashion, luxuries, ingredients, or even treats for themselves. They could have wasted it on potions and pipeweed. “You… really put all that profit into my restoration fund?”
The twins looked at each other, and joined hands. “Every last copper,” they said together.
She swept them up in her arms and smooched the heck out of their adorable little faces. “Thank you, thank you. I’ve got the best babies in the world.”
“Stop it…” whined Koko without much conviction.
“You’re embarrassing,“ added Lulu without any honesty.
[1] Shandy: mixing small amounts of alcohol with large amounts of lemonade or sweetened soda water.
[TAZ Prompts Remaining: 5]
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Papa was all dressed up fancy. So was Dad. Angus couldn’t explain why this worried him, but the worry lay trembling under his heart nevertheless.
“It’s just tonight,” Papa was saying as he braided his hair. “There was quite the brawl to babysit you while your Dad and I are out.”
“Can’t I come?”
Papa sighed. “Baby… You know we love you. It’s just… We need to re-enforce our bonds with each other. A night where neither of us can pay all of our attention to each other.”
Angus knew about this. Sometimes, parents needed one night where they didn’t have to be parents. “And I’m not going back to the orphanage.”
“Hell, no, Ango. Naw. You got your Uncle and Aunty Bluejeans coming down, then there’s the Fangbattle Aunts and Uncle Magnus.”
Uncle Magnus almost always bought Mitzy with him. That sounded like it could be fun.
“All of them at once?”
“It was better than holding a raffle for the privilege of your company.” Papa pinned up his hair. “Dad and I have our Stones, and if you need us, we’re only a call away. You’re going to be okay. I promise.”
It was easy to believe when they were home. Less so when they weren’t around. He had three Aunts and two Uncles watching over him and Mitzy to play with and that was enough to keep him distracted for a good two hours.
The third hour, when he and his Aunts and Uncles were cooking together, was when it hit him like a bully twice his weight class. Aunty Lup had her eyes the wrong way around. Everything was wrong. Everything was going wrong.
*
The call came before the mains, and they picked up instantly.
“Ango needs us?” came out of their mouths in stereo.
Taako dropped some gemstones on the table and Krav tore them a portal all the way back to their home.
Dinner didn’t matter. The night out was less important than their kid. Taako rolled badly on passing through the Astral plane on the way, but that didn’t matter either. He rolled and recovered before Krav could even offer a hand.
“Daddy! Papa!”
They landed on him in a hug, Taako already purring.
“It’s okay,” soothed Krav. “You’e okay.”
“I didn’t wanna wreck your night. I’m sorry.”
“Hey, you needed us, kiddo. We can have a night out anytime.”
Lup, hovering nearby, said, “He called me ‘Papa’ like twice and then freaked out. I’m not upset about the confusion, sweetie, I promise. You’re okay.”
“I thought… I thought… I thought you were never coming back an’ I kept seeing you outta the corner of my eye an’ it was only Aunty Lup an’…”
He and Krav covered him in kisses. “It’s okay. We’re here, now,” they said, wrapping their little boy up in their arms.
They never saw their show, and their dinner was what the family had cooked up that night. They watched one amongst many of their collection of their moving scrolls.
The important part was that Ango had his family. That he knew they would be coming back. That he could be braver next time.
[TAZ Prompts Remaining: 5]
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“I’ll be back late, so you two go stay at Aunty Mak’s, okay?” La’ming kissed each of the twins on their foreheads. “It’s not a school night, so you can stay up late and watch shitty television and eat shittier food if you want.”
Koko rolled his eyes and blew a raspberry.
Lulu elbowed him and said, “Gourmet pizza exists, dingus.”
“If it can have pineapple on it, it’s not gourmet,” grumbled Koko[1].
“Don’t worry about me, okay. I’m fine. It’s just a really long session at the studio.” She spared a word for Makarune. “Don’t let them cook anything extravagant, okay? They should be kids. It’s burgers and popcorn kids crave, not pate du foi gras or whatever.”
“You try to cook a decent Pappardelle one time…” grumbled Koko.
“Don’t let ‘em run through your budget,” La’ming whispered. “Common, everyday ingredients, only.”
Makarune saluted. “I honestly don’t mind having a couple of little gourmet chefs in my kitchen. Go. Do your thing. It’ll be fine.”
It wasn’t.
Most of the day went well, but all it took to ruin a good day was a slick patch on a polished floor and a bad fall.
The twins didn’t know about any of this until the next morning, when they checked their emails.
It was a simple, brief message from a ran.som@gmail.com and it said, Got your mom. Email back 4 deets.
The screaming happened exactly five seconds after the message sank in. The twins ran for Makarune. They ran for Angus, on the top floor. They raised fifteen colours of stink and nobody could get a word in edgewise between the two of them. Not that either of them were making much in the way of sense.
The words ‘ransom letter’ and ‘mom’ surfaced a lot, but since the twins were talking over each other the entire time, it took a few moments to unriddle.
By then, Makarune had dosed them with the special sedative apple pancakes and hot chocolate. The emergency meeting of friends of the family had to happen on the rooftop garden, since it was most of the apartment block by then.
Avi was there with Johaan, hand in hand. The Pithons were there, as were the McDonalds. Then there was Makarune desperately trying to keep the twins at least on something resembling an even keel. So far, the Pithons were assisting by wrapping the twins up in their tails, Avi was attempting to coach them through some breathing and memory exercises, Johaan was playing Calm Emotion, and the McDonalds were analysing the shit out of the email.
“What kind of kidnapper sends a CC?” wondered Agatha.
“Or uses Gmail?” pondered Angus.
“Whaddathey want from us?” Koko snivelled. He had his hands wrapped around a big mug that almost dripped marshmallows and cream. “We’re kids. We don’t got shit…”
Lulu wiped her face. “I been savin’ up my pocket money, an’… I got… almos’ twenny dollars?”
Agatha elbowed Angus, pointing to something on the screen. Angus peered at it, lifting his glasses up. He said, “Oh, shit.”
Koko started out-and-out bawling again. “It’s the curse! It’s the cur-hur-hurse… I hurt our mo-o-o-om…”
Lulu wrapped herself around him. “We’re not bad luck, doofus. Our stupid father didn’t know anything about anything. We’re not cursed.”
“Indeed you’re not,” said Angus. “This isn’t a ransom email. It’s an email from someone who’s name concatenates into ‘ransom’. Specifically, ran dot som.”
“I think it might be from one of your mom’s… co-workers. Ransei Somner.” Also known as Hornee D’Lite to a select crowd. “I’ve emailed her back. Your mom took a tumble and broke her arm. She’s in recovery and I have the ward details.
Koko gulped down the hot chocolate. Lulu did the same. Together, they said, “Is she okay?”
*
La’ming surfaced from a cloud of dandelion extract. Her left arm really hurt. “Ma’am… There’s a large crowd of people here to see you. They say they’re your family.”
She looked over to Ransei. The large, thickset tiefling said, “I only emailed your kids,” and shrugged.
“Wanna see m’ babies,” La’ming slurred, deep in the valley of the dandelions. “They’ll be worried about me…”
The nurse pulled aside the curtain enough so that La’ming could see the entire fucking crowd of worried residents from her apartment block.
“Heeeeyyyy,” she crooned. “Th’ gang’s all here… Where’s my babies?”
Twin golden streaks shrieked, “Mom!” and then she was covered in family. Not so skinny, any more, but still so small and so light and very, very wet.
“Din’ wanna make y’ cry, m’ poor babies…” It was very important to kiss them. She couldn’t kiss them enough. “It’s okay… they got me onna good stuff.”
“Ease up,” said Ransei. “Careful of her left arm.”
“Is this your family, ma’am?”
La’ming squinted at the mob. “Yeah, they is m’ fam’ly. We all ‘dopted eachother…”
Ransei introduced herself to the family as a ‘co-worker’. She had had the foresight to get into some street-passable clothes before climbing into the ambulance with La’ming.
Those who recognised her as Hornee D’Lite kept that knowledge to themselves.
She was a thickset, russet-coloured tiefling with an enormous set of horns. Everything about her was thick.
“You didn’t tell me your babies were this cute,” she cooed. “Hey, there li’l darlin’s. I work with your momma. Can I cuddle you?”
Lulu looked to La’ming, who slurred, “Rans issa ver’ gen’l frien’…”
She was also, the twins discovered, soft and warm and the kind of comfort they needed at that exact moment.
The assembled crowd of well-wishers decided to wait until La’ming was sober before telling her about the upset, that morning.
[1] Opinions expressed by characters are not necessarily that of the author.
[TAZ Prompts Remaining: 10]
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It should have been yet another day in the markets. Taako got distracted by some of the latest gizmos from Miller Labs and buttonholed the salesperson about how exactly their pastry roller could save time and effort when it required three times the messing about than the original pastry.
It had been going on for some time before Market Security turned up.
“Sir,” said one of them. “Your son has been in an altercation with a local gang.”
He never expected his heart to drop like it did. “Where is he? Is he all right?” after half a second to actually think, he added, “Did he win?”
One of the guards handed the other two gold.
“Come with me, sir,” said the winner of the wager.
Taako was wont to walk a little faster than these particular members of the Watch, anxiously looking for any sign of a big trouble.
Burned bunting. Frozen bunting. Some upturned planters. Something had gone down here. Five guys bigger than Ango each were being seen to by Clerics whilst under the hairy eyeball of bigger, burlier Watchmen.
There, in a seat purloined from a nearby furniture store, was Ango. Bruised, battered, a little frost-rimed, but whole.
“Hello, sir.”
Taako felt like he could breathe again. “There’s my beautiful magic boy,” he said, and lunged.
“Oof! Sir… I haven’t had my turn with the local Clerics, yet.”
“Ah, what’s one point in grapple damage?” Taako breezed, pretending to not care but easing up all the same. “What happened, genius?”
Ango cast Mending on his glasses, which were a little warped. “I bumped into their leader as they were lifting some jewellery off the displays, thus revealing their ruse, sir. They took umbrage to that.”
“I’ll take my Umbrastaff to their asses if they try that shit again,” mumbled Taako.
“I don’t think that’s at all necessary, sir.”
“Horseshit,” said Taako, automatically.
“I mean… I did trounce them sir.”
“Sir?” said a Watchman. “The Clerics are ready for your son.”
Ango looked to Taako, who merely deferred a place of access for the priestly sort. He said, “Uh. He’s not my dad…”
“For shame,” Taako mock-sobbed. “Disowned by my own flesh and blood! Why are you ashamed of your old man? Is it because I remarried after your poor dear mother…”
“Sir…” Ango chided.
Taako faked more tears.
He cleared his throat. “Da-a-ad…”
Taako instantly recovered. “I forgive you,” he allowed. He leaned close to that cute little Humanman ear and whispered, “Nice job on the other two chucklefucks, but do not for one instant think I’m that easily gulled.”
They looked each other in the eye. One apprentice villain to an old master. Both were smiling, but in a calculating way.
Ango won, though, with upraised arms and, “Carry me home, daddy?”
Oooh. He was getting good.
At some point down the line, he’d have to explain that the Elven words for ‘apprentice’ and ‘child/descendent’ were one and the same.
Ango was damn heavy and awkward to carry. Despite that, or maybe because of it, Taako caught himself purring for the damn brat. Then he caught Ango’s sly smirk.
Damn kid already knew.
[TAZ Prompts Remaining: 8]
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Angus was allegedly helping Merle with Earl business in Bottlenose Cove. What he was actually doing was essentially imitating Radar from Fantasy MASH. Working out what the Cove needed for its assorted rebuilding projects, making a note of them, and telling Merle a fraction of a second ahead of Merle telling him to do the exact same thing.
Mavis, also trailing in his orbit, was detailing the guilds who could help with everything that needed organising. Meanwhile, Mookie was… just being Mookie.
“Sir you should really warn Mookie about–”
“GET DOWN OFF’A THERE BEFORE YOU FALL DOWN OFF’A THERE I ONLY HAVE SO MANY SPELL SLOTS FOR HEALS, PANDAMNIT!”
“Didja thee how far up I climbed, pop? That wath like two thtorieth or sump’n, wazinit?”
“Yeah you’re a regular Fantasy Sir Hillary. Knock it off before you kill your old man from fright, okay?” He paused for the seemingly mandatory wrestling match with his rambunctious son. “Keep it to heights you know you won’t bust your skull open from, okay?”
Construction sites were a semi-natural playground for Mookie. It seemed like a busted skull would only mildly slow him down.
Mookie took off again at Fantasy Warp Nine, up on the scaffolding with an innate hubris only ever reached by small children who had no idea of how badly the world could hurt, sometimes.
“Maybe you should quit–”
“I aughta quit casting Shield of Faith on the kid,” Merle grumbled as he cast Shield of Faith on the kid. “Teach him a lesson, maybe.”
Anyone and their kid brothers’ dog could tell he’d never go that far. Hekubah would fucking kill him if he did.
A newcomer tapped Angus on the shoulder. An Elven merchant, apparently, leading a camel that was seemingly chewing three bars of soap. “Young sir, can you remind your father that he has an appointment?”
Angus, inlined to his own brand of mischief, smirked and said, “Oh father, dear…”
“What? I ain’t your fuckin’ daddy.”
Right in front of strangers. Angus cried on cue. “How could you be so mean to me, daddy? Is it ‘cause I can’t grow a beard like you?”
Merle caught up with things. The Elf judging him hard, the way Mavis was hiding giggles behind her hand. The distant snorts of Taako, who had an over-the-horizon radar and instant approval for this kind of horseshit. “Aaaah, shit,” he muttered. “He’s not a Dwarf.”
“YOU MEAN I’M ADOPTED, TOO?”
Somewhere, he was sure, the twins were laughing their asses off. In fact, he could hear them. That high-pitched cackle of theirs carried.
Merle took him by the shoulder and glared up into his eyes. “Kid,” he said. “No matter what happens, I still got Li'l Smoosher.”
Angus cut the act cold. “In-joke amongst the crew, sir. I’m actually a humanman boy and no relation to Earl Merle, here.”
“Kids these days, anh?” said Merle. “Ango, you go practice casting Featherfall on Mookie before he hurts himself.”
[TAZ Prompts Remaining: 9]
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Avi slowed as he passed the fire escape. It was getting dark, and it was getting chilly, and that little girl that had been up there this morning, was still up there now. Sure, she had a light to read by, but she was looking mighty cold. All huddled up with her knees inside her dress.
Sno, who had marched ahead, stopped and turned back. “What?” she said.
Avi nodded his head in the kids’ general direction. “I think something smells wrong with a situation, here.”
Their chief had them on the shittiest jobs. Enforcing CPS visits, rules, and decrees. Separating kids from the only families they knew. Sweeping kids up off the streets when they’d been thrown out of their homes… sometimes recovering sad, small bodies from culverts, dumpsters, and gutters. They got to have a second sense about things being hinky.
Sno saw it in a second, of course. “Aw shit. D-U-N?” Quasi-forensics code for Dead Upstairs Neighbour.
City life lead to some fucked up shit, sometimes. Like neighbours not knowing that a fellow neighbour had died until the foul-smelling ichor leaked into their own areas. Or children living with the deceased bodies of their parents until something forced the information out into the open.
This tiny little figure on the fire escape was small enough to not know what death looked like. Just like a certain pair of twins in her case file who had cooked for themselves for two months before… Well. That had been a nasty one.
Avi, usually the smiling, welcome face of the NWPD, walked in his patented Friendly Goof manner towards the fire escape. “Hi there, cutie…” he cooed.
She hid behind her book with barely a whimper.
“So much for the Burnsides’ famous rustic hospitality,” Sno teased. She edged around to the kids’ peripheral vision and did her best impersonation of harmlessness. It came off as somewhere between burning fuse, loaded gun, and growling dog with orange eyebrows. “Hey. My name’s Sno. What’s yours?”
She didn’t hide, but rather peeked past her book with one eye.
*
“Hey, up there,” the blue-ish police woman waved again. “Can I come up?"
Lucretia looked down at the officers. There was the nice young man and the scary blue lady and they weren’t going away like everyone else did. She’d seen the scary blue lady around the neighbourhood, and had once seen her taking down a bad guy at the bodega. She was the good kind of scary. Lucretia nodded.
She winced when the fire escape shook, all the same.
"No, Burnsides. You stay down here. If we both come up, we could spook her. She gave me permission."
The nice young man said, "Okay, but when she screams at you, I’m coming up there for mop-up."
"Just gimmie one of those lollipops you always have and I’ll try it your way.”
Lucretia watched as the scary lady came up. Watched as she slowed down the closer she came to Lucretia’s sunny spot. Watched in silence and read the name, “Ton” on her badges. There were other words, too. Serve and Protect.
“Pretty cold up here, isn’t it?”
Lucretia had to agree. She nodded.
“I see you have an umbrella for rain. That’s smart. Do you have something for the cold? Or would you like my jacket?"
Lucretia glanced inside the window into her home. She didn’t like going in there if she could help it. The smell was getting real bad. She took a risk and pointed to the jacket. It was nice and warm when scary Ton wrapped it around her.
"Is it bad inside?” said scary Ton.
Lucretia had to nod. It was very bad inside.
“Nobody hurts you,” it was more a statement than a question. Police were clever and saw lots of things. Scary Ton would notice things like bruises. Or little stains that weren’t washed out of Lucretia’s cleanest clothes.
Lucretia nodded again.
“Who’s looking after you, sweetie?"
You had to be honest with police. Lucretia pointed at herself.
"Are your people sick?”
Lucretia thought about that one. They were sick. Mom and Dad had been very, very sick. And then they stopped coughing and throwing up and stopped breathing and started smelling bad. She shrugged.
“Can I go see?” said Scary Ton.
She couldn’t work out why she wanted to, but Lucretia nodded.
Scary Ton went inside, and coughed some, too. Then she came back outside. “You’re right. It’s very bad in there. I can take you somewhere that’s better. Would you like that?"
Lucretia nodded, and when Scary Ton came all the way out onto the fire escape, she latched onto the Police Officer’s leg and wouldn’t let go.
The nice young man down on the street thought this was so funny, but Lucretia just wanted to feel safe. Scary Ton was scarier than anything else in the whole world and would protect Lucretia from everything, she just knew it.
Lucretia wanted ‘safe’ more than anything in the whole wide world.
“Okay, okay…” Scary Ton cooed. “I can’t take you anywhere like that. Come on… up a bit… up to my hip, huh? I need that foot for later.”
It took some wrestling, but Lucretia wound up on Scary Ton’s hip and the coat got put back on with Lucretia still inside. Scary Ton held her close and patted her hair and she was warm and smelled nice and Lucretia didn’t want to feel scared when she was like that.
*
Sno lowered down the kid’s supplies in a bag with the help of some string. Her coming down the fire escape with the kid on one hip was a complicated matter, but she was agile enough to get them both down without trouble.
“Double ten-fifty-five,” she said. 10-55. Coroner’s case.
She flinched away from Avi’s offer of touch.
“Hey, it’s okay, Lucretia…” she’d learned the name inside the apartment. A name plate on her door plus confirmation via found ID’s gave her name as Lucretia Clarke. Her own attempts at writing practically screamed that she preferred her full name, rather than Luce, Lucy, or any other derivative diminutive. “This is Avi. He’s my friend. And you know what? He’s always got lollipops.” The last sentence had been added in a conspiratorial whisper.
Avi, on cue, used some sleight of hand to produce one as if by magic. This one was yellow, like Lucretia’s pale blonde hair. “Ah? You can take it, it’s okay.”
Lucretia burrowed into the confines of Sno’s coat. “Guess she’s not a fan of candy. Or she’s not a fan of you.”
“Fine, I’ll call it in. You keep her cosy.”
Sno juggled the kid on her hip a little. Amazed at every turn how someone that small could get so heavy. There’d be no getting this kid to let go, that was a white-knuckle grip she had on Sno’s clothes. “You know… if you feel like talking, you can tell me why you like me. I’m not exactly popular with kids like you.”
Lucretia didn’t say a word, just closed her eyes so she could listen intensely to Sno’s chest.
Judging by the condition of the bodies, she hadn’t heard an adult’s heartbeat or breathing for five months.
“It’s gonna be okay,” she whispered. “I got’cha. I got’cha.” One breath to steady herself. Two. Three. And, oh fuck… she was purring for this kid.
Now what?
[TAZ Prompts Remaining: 7]
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Still Tumbl'd, Still TAZ - Chapter 16 - InterNutter - The Adventure Zone (Podcast) [Archive of Our Own]
In this chapter: Taako and Lup meet some old friends from before the Stolen Century. Sort of.
Good news, bad news, good news… good news, he had an act that was a guaranteed draw. Practically everything the Elf twins Lulu and Koko did was an instant draw for paying customers. This included the Wild Things of Bor’ne’o, their cooking in the Chuck Wagon, and their futzing around with the high-wire folk. They could draw a curious crowd by washing dishes. It was amazing.
Bad news, that selfsame act was the biggest drain on the circus’ Bail Fund. No matter how well they dressed, acted, or behaved, they were bound to get arrested for doing something whilst Elven. That was also amazing, but in the opposite direction.
The twins spent most of their time pretending they didn’t speak common. Playing the fool at virtuoso levels while the circus got acclimated to them. Montgomery, being ringmaster, owner, manager, and ersatz parent to the entire fucking circus, kept them with him in his caravan for mutual safety.
Five arrests in as many towns had left the kids gun-shy about going anywhere or doing anything without some kind of guardian nearby. Which meant Montgomery had them permanently in his shadow whenever they weren’t working. He was, after all, the only figure in authority who seemed to hold a vested interest in their welfare at all.
Gods alone knew how they were going to handle the Winter Campgrounds.
Gods alone knew how his wife was going to handle the additions to the informal family.
Thus it was that he took the last turn towards Varmvale with some trepidation in his heart. Further south than Neverwinter, the snows never reached it. The lands were wide and the seaside proved a draw for the wealthy when the circus was out touring. There, the friends and family of the tour waited for winter for the circus to come home.
His dear darling Exandria didn’t travel well, and managed the town as mayor during all seasons, all whilst raising their hatchlings in the comfort of their home.
Lulu and Koko roused from their torpor in the caravan and emerged to peer over the vertiginous curves of the main road to Varmvale. They chattered to each other in their own tongue, sounding trepidatious as they spoke.
“Looks like a pretty small town, Monty,” said Lulu eventually, ignoring Koko trying to pull her back into the safety of the caravan. “How are we gonna earn enough to get out of it?”
“We don’t have to,” he said. “This is where the circus winters.” He did not call it ‘home’ as Koko was allergic to that word. “You two can stay with my family or reside in one of the cabins for the cold season, though we do expect you to keep it clean and orderly if you do.”
“No way,” said Koko. “There’s a Mama Monty?”
“A Mrs Monty,” Montgomery allowed, using their own terms. “And a few Montlings.”
Koko muttered something in the twins’ language and got an elbow from Lulu. Whatever he said must have been rude. Montgomery ignored the exchange.
Lulu said, “Just checkin’, you’re -uh- you’re not… fattening us up for Candlenights or that, right?”
“Nonsense. Roast Elf is for Midsummer.” Montgomery could bite himself for that joke. These were flighty kids, prone to just run off if things looked too dangerous. “You’re way too profitable alive and whole to become any portion of any given meal.”
“Promise?” said Koko, to receive another elbow from his sister.
“No harm will come to you,” he said. The words seemed to be wearing a groove in his forked tongue. These kids must have come afoul of a lot of liars in their brief years. “You two make more in ticket sales than you cost in bail, I want you to stay with us.”
They didn’t fight on the road down into the vale. They clung to rails or permanent parts of the caravan until the inherent fall into the bottom of the valley was no longer a threat. After they were on more level ground, they adjourned to the interior of the caravan for a good old brawl.
Montgomery let them battle the ginger out of their veins. It would be a while yet before the long and winding roads took them towards the gigantic parking zone for the circus’ storage and stables. The twins eventually tired of their battle and surfaced to watch from the relative safety of the caravan roof. An ideal spot to turn and bolt from if things looked dangerous.
Montgomery could pick out the cosy little house where his family resided. He could spot Exandria by her hat. That silly straw hat she always wore when she was working in the garden. He could see his oldest daughter, too. Gathering her share of the harvest into a basket on top of her head.
Almost. Almost there. Other houses escaped his notice. He couldn’t care less about them right now. His eyes were on the next fork in the road, the next turn, this landmark or that. Every mark that meant he was closer and closer to his family’s loving arms.
They were waiting for him in the parking grounds. Exandria, Lilly, Rosemary, and a new little one in Exandria’s arms. This new figure had a hood. A boy. He had no heed for whether or not the twins followed, he simply sprang off the caravan and rushed to greet his first son.
The baby boy was concerning himself with gumming at his own wrists. He must be working on his infant fangs. Thank goodness Yuan’ti poison glands didn’t come in until the child was in their teens.
“More waifs and strays?” Exandria was peering past Montgomery’s left arm.
Only now was he aware of the presences so close to his tail. The twins clustered close to each other and, using his body as a shield, hunkered out of immediate grasping range whilst simultaneously peering around at the collected ‘Montlings’.
“They don’t have anyone else,” said Montgomery. “They’re very talented performers and… they need security.”
Exandria sized the two of them up in a cold second. “You two are welcome to my home. Any time.”
Lulu and Koko exchanged glances, exchanged chatter in their private tongue. Eventually, Koko said, “No… thank you?”
Lulu, bolder of the two, said, “Is is safe to hold your baby?”
“His name is Daniil.” Exandria had a dark joke, too. “If you don’t steal him, he won’t bite.”
Montgomery helped Lulu hold baby Daniil. He wondered anew that such a small creature could exist. Lulu and Koko seemed to be wondering, too. They clustered around Daniil.
Daniil cooed for the new faces, and wriggled into the twins’ body heat with small, happy noises.
For the first time in Montgomery’s hearing, the twins started to purr.
“Oh gods, he’s adorable,” Koko crooned, thus gaining eternal favour in Exandria’s eyes.
“He’s so cute,” singsonged Lulu. “I wanna steal him already.”
Good gods, that was an actual joke. They were getting confident. Montgomery was impressed. Nevertheless, he wanted to hold his baby boy.
“My turn, thank you,” he said, easing his son out of teenaged Elven arms. The twins still hovered close, watching Daniil squirm in his infant way. “Welcome to the family,” he said. To his son and to the twins at the same time.
[TAZ Prompts Remaining: 7]
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Challenge #02208-F018: Relative Superman
A Havenworlder was adopted and raised by Humans from a young age. – Anon Guest
A ruined city. A lone survivor. Those who had come to help take the orphan in with the best of intentions… So many stories of heroes begin that way. One famous one has the orphan saving their adopted world for all of their life. Red capes optional.
Such was not the case for Sylkin. She was a Thof, and the only survivor of a Vorax raid on a now-ruined planet. She had no family but the Humans who had taken her in. Humans knew how comparatively fragile the Thof were. Thusly, Sylkin’s new parents were hyper-protective. Starting with finding an environment where such a family would be both safe and welcome.
Thus it was on Farreach Station, one of the stranger families in the Edge Territories found its place. Sylkin had a team of six parents, one watching over her at any given hour. All of them Deathworlders. All of them too aware of the mishaps that could occur to such a fragile being. Thof were, after all, Class Three Havenworlders. More delicate than most who made it into the Galactic Scene without assistance.
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