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Dear Hoarders:

If you have perishable shit in your hoard, use it now. It is only going to spoil if you hang on to it for too long.

Got too much?

Maybe have an honour box by your yield to gain partial redemption on your alleged investment. It’s never going to pay you back but consider this: You’re not going to profit from a bag of weevils either, you turgid potato.

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