Challenge #02485-F295: Something She Ate?
A: I didn’t know that humans spit acids
H: uhg we usually don’t, I think I ate something toxic
A: I see so the acid is used to neutralize the toxins
H: it really isn’t. Get back I’m gonna blow another chunk – Anon Guest
[Offensensitivity warning: descriptions of regurgitation]
The Human digestive system is a mass of toxic substances in valved tubes. – Gryxnu’s Comparative Anatomy, 236 GalStand years before Human Admission into the Galactic Alliance.
221 Years before the Human Admission…
Human Bob evicted a stream of acid and other substances that Medik Gryxnu’s livesuit registered as dangerous and informed on procedures to safely neutralise it. Step one included powdered cellulose. Step two was to seal off the area to prevent incidental contagion. Fortunately, a Medik’s livesuit has extras that untrained lay people just don’t have access to. Step three was where it started to get complicated.
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Challenge #02484-F294: Essential Briefing
A new security force is in training so they can be assigned to various stations. The subject of this particular lecture was the phenomena involving human Silly Seasons. What they were, how to recognize when one was about to happen, how to handle them, and most important, how to curtail the humans safely before the Silly Season got too far out of hand. – DaniAndShali
Given that this station has opened its airlocks to admit Humans, we at Administration are well aware of your concerns. We’re well aware of Humans’ unpredictability and the unique ur-festival known amongst their kind as Silly Season. Just as we are aware that one is impending. Humans get bored, no matter what their opportunities for enrichment are. The resultant tensions build up and result in a chaotic party-adjacent atmosphere that spreads like a virus until the Humans vent their pent-up tensions.
This… is Silly Season. The soundless video shows a chaotic group of Humans jumping and cavorting in a group. Some of them, judging strictly by the rhythm of their gyrations, were possibly singing and dancing. Many were just doing chaotic things. Most were laughing.
For the most part, these activities are harmless. Humans play pranks - practical jokes - on each other and any species they know can withstand the jape in question. They do understand that there are environmental and biota protection laws and the pranks will follow most of those legislations. Expect flour bombs- the video showed a thrown object exploding in white powder -water bombs- another missile, this time soaking the target on impact -and organic glitter or confetti bombs- the thrown object cascaded small items around the target. Here, the only lingering problem is clean-up. Fortunately, the Cleaners are attracted to this kind of nonsense.
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Challenge #02482-F292: Sauce Please
Humans are known to be very adaptable to most conditions thanks in no small part to the horrors that come naturally on their home planet. So while many aliens won’t be making Earth a tourist hot spot of the galaxy, the next best thing to experience human cultures are the restaurants in the space stations or food markets on a human colony. Seriously, if you have to think of nutrition requirements for more then two different species but can only go to one source? An authentic human restaurant is your best bet. – from tumblr
Humans have a very wide definition of ‘edible’. Many of them also pride themselves on their capacity for hospitality. It shouldn’t have come as a shock that Human restaurants catered to local cuisine as well as disparate Galactic needs associated with a blend of Havenworlders, Deathworlders, and every creature in-between. Yet, it did anyway.
Welcome to the Edge Territories. The best place to find hives of scum and villainy. Also the most checkered collections of civilisations ranging from 'technically’ to 'surprisingly advanced’. You can also find the kind of restaurants that would not be found anywhere else.
Welcome to Eldy’s. The 'Eat’ has been crudely painted on two different pieces of salvage and bolted or nailed to the superstructure on either side of the sign. There, the scent of cooking food wafts out with the steam, where clever use of the ventilation system is more or less free advertising. The menus are in GalSimple with pictures of what the expected meal looks like. Halos and skulls indicate which offerings are safe for Havenworlders and which ones are strictly for Deathworlders only. The number of each symbol indicates which level they’re safe for. While everyone can safely ingest Level 5 Havenworlder fare, the same does not hold true for Level 5 Deathworlder food. Which, it might be noted, also can contain scofield scale levels.
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Challenge #02481-F291: Complete Medical Intervention
It may be only 2% of our body mass, but for every cell we have in our body there ten of them. Bacteria are relatively harmless for the most parts. They help digest food, strengthen our immune system, and could kill us if escape from ours guts. – Anon Guest
Humans are, for the most part, completely unaware that they exist in a state of symbiosis. If asked, most of them would mention their mitochondria, a symbiote so involved that it has become part of almost every cell in their bodies. They do not consider their own bacterial ecology.
They have no idea, or most of them don’t, that their bacteria are so important to the proper functioning of their bodies that changing the ecology inside their own digestive system changes the course of their health. In fact, many deny that this is the case, claiming that their bodily systems are completely isolated from each other.
Hollistic medicine - which examines the whole patient instead of one of their systems - has been anathema to enormous swathes of Human medicine. Including a great many patients. The opposition to such often borders on superstition. Therefore, dealing with many Colonial-Origin Humans can be… educational for the attending Medik.
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Challenge #02479-F289: What in a Name
A small movement has cropped up amongst the Vorax. People who would rather try to live quiet, peaceful, lives instead of piracy and war. When the government goes to make an example out of them, they take the only ship they can get their hands on and flee. They find an uninhabited haven world that’s suitable for them to live on and settle down to live quiet lives as farmers, raising their meat animals, hunting wild game, fishing, growing crops, and just having what they wanted most. Peace, not only with each other, but with the galaxy around them. When the less peaceful Vorax come to destroy the colony, they find out that humans, and others, don’t take well to bullies, and show the peaceful colony how wrong, and how right, the stories were about the Vorax’s old enemies. – DaniAndShali
When other cultures met the Vikings, the concept of Norsemen or Danes were conglomerated into that one, first idea. Never mind that those who farmed considered themselves different from those who traded or raided. They were all ‘Vikings’ to the rest of the world, because that was their first impression.
The exact same thing happened to the Vorax. Vorax was not, as it happened, a species name, but rather an occupation, just like the Vikingr once were. They called themselves Vorax because that was what they did. They were Voraxyr. The others called themselves Thranityr but they called themselves that in vain. The rest of the Galactic Alliance had heard Vorax first. So, too, had the Humans… and you know how terrible they are at letting go of the first idea to enter their fluffy little heads.
For centuries, they could not be convinced of the existence of more than two gender identities because they claimed it was unnatural. The hubris and the ignorance inherent just boggles the mind. You have to do immense amounts of work to re-convince the Humans. Even then, the initial label will never go away. Vorax, they were introduced as, and Vorax they will remain. Potentially forever. Hardly anyone remembers who the Vikings who weren’t Vikingr were called[1].
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