Daily OpusEverything I write is freely rebloggable. Just keep the source and tell people about my books :D [Until I decide otherwise, my pronouns are Ze/Hir/Hirself. As in "Ze went to the shops to get hir medication hirself". Thank you for the respect.]
Once again, thank you everyone for reading, enjoying, and sharing this comic. Not just sharing in the sense of re-posting this comic, (which you should totally do) but also sharing your stories with me, letting my know how my comics have touched you. It means so much to me. Love ya!
Stay tuned for more comics! <3
It gives me tremendous joy to see people still reading this comic, and especially when they get something out of it.
Over the years I have faced many ups and downs, just like everyone else. Sometimes it really gets to me how mean people can be to each other. How mean I can be to myself.
But for all the Level 1 Trans Fighters out there please know with acceptance, mindfulness, and self compassion I did in fact find my balance. Not a fast process. Basically a complete lifestyle change.
Sometimes I lose that balance, sure. But when I choose to present my authentic identity? I’m objectively drop dead gorgeous.
Here are a hand full of my looks. You’ll notice none of them are 100% masculine or feminine.
Peace be with you. Thank you for reading. Thank you for being you.
-J
You deserve to feel comfortable, so don’t push yourself to go at a faster pace. It’ll hurt you more.
Reblogging both for stellar comic and wonderful mustache
always reblog! I love this comic, so very much. *offers all the kudos* Thank you for this, it continues to help a lot. You look amazing in those lipstick shades, by the way.
I’ve always loved this comic. Even though I didn’t go one thing at a time, it was definitely a process of baby steps for me too. Incremental progress, but still progress.
Hello! Can I ask about your "children shouldn't be given adult responsibility" post? (genuine question) Instinctively I agree as I believe children should be treated like human beings but not like adults, but I am confused on what you mean by adult responsability. Could you clarify? Thank you for your time, and have a nice day!
When I was younger, folks seemed pretty comfortable with telling me I was “an old soul”, or, “acted like an adult”. I was a sharp kid with a large vocabulary who spent a lot of time reading quietly, so I guess the perception was that I was therefore more “grown up” than other kids my age.
Which, you know, made an otherwise lonely and isolated child feel pretty important and special, so it was easy for me to feel flattered when it signed me up for extra responsibilities.
I was six when I was first left alone to take care of the baby. I was seven when I got my first summer job. I was eight when I was put in charge of my own chicken coop; feeding, cleaning, buying feed and all.
I was special, I was different, I was “treated like a grown up”. I was proud of that.
Then I got older, and more tired, and the limitations stayed the same while the responsibilities and expectations kept piling up.
No, I couldn’t stay home while my family went on an overnight trip, I was too young for that.
But the adults were both out somewhere overnight? Sure, I could take care of two younger kids, cook dinner, put them to bed by 8 and have them off to school in the morning.
I remember, once things began to decline, repeating rather often:
“Either give me adult responsibilities and adult privileges, or child responsibilities and child privileges. Don’t give me child privileges and adult responsibilities- either I’m an adult or a kid. Make up your mind.”
It turns out that “adult responsibilities” isn’t quite the same thing as “adult respect”.
But even if it was, though- even if I was treated with all the benefits and freedoms of adulthood alongside all the work, I was still a kid.
Kids need free time. Kids need sleep. Kids need to *not* have to lay awake at night wondering what they’re going to make for school lunches, or how they’re going to cook dinner for six when the stovetop burners went out.
And it’s not necessarily because they can’t handle the pressure, but because there should be Actual Adults in their life doing those things. If not for the labour aspect, but for the respect and security of it.
My parent says I can’t wear shoes in the house? Why do they care? I’m the one who mops the floors.
I’m not allowed to stay home alone? What, you trust me with your baby but you don’t trust me with your house?
The family pet died and I’m tasked with burying it? Cool, grief is isolated and nobody cares, and when I’m scared or in pain, the authority figures in my life will be distant and emotionally unavailable. I have no reason to believe anyone will support me through emotional hardship in the future.
When it comes to responsibility, its not so much a question of, “can the child handle the work?”, but, “what precedent is this setting for their perception of the future?”, and, “What is this teaching them about actual adults?”
A child who sits quietly and draws is no more an adult than a child who eats glue and sticks pens up their nose, but both deserve to be respected as people, and both deserve to feel as though the adults in their lives are stable, reliable, secure, and have their best interests in mind.
Responsibility is not the same as respect, and there is a mile of difference between “can” and “should”.
“I see you’re sick/sad! Let me do my best to distract you from that so you can stop thinking about it and feel better!”
“You’re really excited about this thing and I don’t understand it but I’m trying to be excited about it too because you love it!”
I legitimately cried reading this list.
Addendum to “here is a story of my best screwup…”
Not really knowing what to say to comfort someone (or just not being able to think of a response in general) and defaulting to, “I will tell a story about something similar that happened to me as a way of indicating that I am listening and their feelings are understood and valid!” BUT then later realizing, “Oh… did that come off as me making it all about me? I just meant to commiserate as a way of bonding/cheering them up/relating to them but I think it came off as just blowing them off to talk about something else.”
Also: someone tells you a thing and you respond with “OH I KNOW THINGS ABOUT THAT THING or something tangential but related to it” and next thing you know you’re infodumping and steering the conversation in several different directions and you realize too late that you just commandeered the original point and it makes it seem like you aren’t interested in what they had to say or like you’re being a know-it-all and no one can follow how you got from point A to point X (least of all yourself) and aaaaaaa this was not the intention I was just trying to be an active participant in one (1) social interaction. I will now be silent for the rest of the day
My brother saved this document and everytime he gets angry at our neighbours for being loud he prints it to their wireless printer and you can hear the wife shout “Why the fuck would you print this AGAIN?!” to her son.
every time we serve chicken at work i think of this post
1. If you were wondering, you can type the numbers in the works cited into google and they appear to be medical journal articles about using medical imaging to detect and diagnose a rare form of Gastritis.
2. Please enjoy the offical powerpoint presentation of this paper at an academic conference by the original author, complete with Q&A:
THIS IS GOLD
oh m god please watch the video it’s some of the most contagious laughter on the planet
When I saw this cross my dash tonight, I smiled and thought “yess, the chicken chicken chicken post, I get to reblog it again and inflict it on all of the people that have followed me since last time”, and then I scrolled down more and to my utter delight there was A VIDEO, needless to say my night has been made
I HAVE NOT SEEN THE CHICKEN VIDEO IN TEN DAMN YEARS HOLY SHIT
STILL FUNNY
The bell
The last question
The woman howling in laughter 90% of the time
It’s all beautiful
It’s all
So beautiful
I love that he was absolutely 100% prepared for a question in chickenese.
This carving of a penis was recently found etched into Hadrian’s Wall in England. Further investigation revealed the carving itself was actually made by a Roman soldier 1800 years ago, proving that, despite the human race’s continual evolution over the past 2 thousand years, some things really never do change.
