Challenge #02721-G164: Hail Poetry!
The sign said “Old Terran style poetry for sale! Custom sonnets, written for you about what you love, in GalStand! Please fill out form and provide one Hour; finished poem will be sent to you within the next ten days. 50% discount for JOATs.” The human seated at the table the sign hung from had a large stack of blank forms, a couple of completed forms, several one Hour notes, a notebook, and what looked like several kinds of dictionary. They were busily scribbling in the notebook and muttering to themself, occasionally crossing things out, and frequently checking the dictionaries.
On closer inspection, one of the “dictionaries” was actually a thesaurus. – Anon Guest
[AN: I can’t write sonnets to save my life so I’m faking out of doing that]
It was a pop-up sales booth, much favoured by the nomadic sorts who sold their artistic skills wherever they could wander. They were selling Terran style poems, but they were not a Terran. They were one of the multitude of Saurian life forms abundant in the Alliance. This was not a form of cultural appropriation, since the Humans were wont to share aspects of their culture wherever they went.
This wasn’t even an important part of their culture, it was merely a form of art that the Humans shared like they shared everything else. He didn’t need to alert the Terran Embassy, and he especially didn’t need to let Shayde know this existed. Better that she never found out.
She may be “Ace”, but she had a great love of romance. The absolute last thing he needed was Shayde purchasing poetry for him. Therefore, he thought it prudent to find out how much this cogniscent needed to take their pop-up booth and their business to an entirely different station. Strictly out of a combination of the decency of his spirit and a strong self-preservation instinct, of course.
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Challenge #02720-G163: A Short Sharp Lesson
Have you even seen humans stomping their feet while chanting the same thing all at once? It’s sometimes hard to believe they’re not a hive mind https://youtu.be/PmILOL55xP0 – Anon Guest
[AN: Video linked contains swearwords and is a war scene]
They said the Human colonists were sessile. They were weak and vulnerable. Look at them, not a single weapon in their entire set of settlements. They were fat and lazy. Allegedly. I learned, just as many of my unit did, that our leaders lied to us.
There is no such thing as an unarmed Human.
They took up tools for construction, random heavy objects, and blades for preparing food, and turned them against us. They organised in less than minutes. We thought their scattering was submission. They were only retreating to regroup.
We followed them to an open field they had marked for one of their games. Upright sticks marked opposite ends and some Humans had gathered at one side. They all turned towards us as one being.
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Challenge #02718-G161: One Cozy Afternoon in a Test Colony Complex
They’d been surveying the planet for several months now, the haven-worlders and their human friends. The planet was more than sufficient for colonization, that seemed to be sure, but they wanted to see how the changing of the seasons played out in full. Sitting within the large shelter base they’d set up, the humans feeding more wood into the fireplace they’d absolutely insisted on building into the design of the base, the captain had an odd feeling of peace as they relaxed on the lounger by the window. Springtime rain was pattering on the roof, the crew and scientists were talking, some playing games of dice, the crackle of the very well contained fire which brought extra warmth into this place. They realized they felt… content tonight. This place felt like… well it felt like home. From when they were young. A rainy night like this? Made them look forward to when this place opened for colonization and they could bring their family here. – Anon Guest
Sometimes, there’s absolutely nothing wrong with a newly-discovered world. It’s almost inevitable. The hazards encountered, planet by planet, result in solutions. Problems solved generations prior in other, harsher environments make the milder ones far more amenable. Sometimes, a world is just right. In this case, just the right amount of challenges to make it a perfect ‘tough love’ colony for level two Havenworlders and a relaxing resort world for their Human counterparts.
They still had to test it for a year. Most of the planetary climate was temperate, but there was always the chance of seasonal surprises. The atmosphere was both breathable and fragrant, the edible flora and fauna plentiful and easily farmed. Life on the new world was good. The Humans did insist on adding a fireplace to the communal space of the habitat, but that was Humans for you. They’d do the strangest things for the most nonsensical of reasons.
The logic of it came at last during a rainy evening with nothing better to do. The Humans were playing one of their more complicated games involving dice, mathematics, and making things up with varying degrees of hilarity. Thork was huddled up with their nestmate under one of the fluffier blankets and listening to the fire crackle and the rain patter against roof and window alike.
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Challenge #02716-G159: An Oldie But a Goodie
The ship is being raided by pirates, you and the human locked yourselves in the storage bay. The human is applying some liquid on their skin, asking “could you help me put on the shield generator?” You assisted them asking what they trying to do. “I’m gonna do a old scare tactic” while talking they snap their fingers and flames begin to cover their arms – Anon Guest
Humans are insane. Many people acknowledge this on an intellectual level as most Humans can carry on in Galactic Society without resorting to their… more interesting problem solving skills. I, Companion Grox, have had personal experience with it. Trust in me. Any Human can go from “almost normal” to “Deathworlder crabonkers” in an instant.
We were being raided by pirates. Human Co was the Ships’ Human on duty at the time, and the others were getting the crew into their lifepods. Human Co had ideas to save the ship, the cargo, and the crew with ordinary household chemicals.
Always beware of Humans and their concoctions of unregulated chemical compounds. We were in a ventilated hold for the cargo that wasn’t safe for exposure to vacuum, and Human Co was mixing things in a near frenzy with their breather already on and activated. I had to stay well away from the smell. I remember asking what ze was doing.
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Challenge #02714-G157: The Extra Option
Humans love stories. Humans also love adventure, and choice, and danger. Thus was born the “choose your own adventure” style of story. A small group of level 5 havenworlders, in an attempt to improve their genetics, undertake reading one of these stories, with the goal to “survive” to the end of the book. They quickly discover that survival alone does not always a “good” ending make. – Anon Guest
Level Five Havenworlders should not exist. Just as Level Five Deathworlders should not exist. Their place on the scale was, until such were discovered, purely theoretical. Naturally, Humans made friends with them both. Humans will befriend anything.
Humans were also able to understand that Level Five Havenworlders were far too fragile to meet in person. However, they had tools with which to help. Humans always have tools to help. They’re a helpful species, for the most part. There are always outliers but other Humans are more than willing to step in and stop them. In this case, the tool was one of Humanity’s oldest - the story.
Humans have a great love of stories. They collect them, they share them, they invent them… they use them to teach, to explain, to predict… they create worlds inside their heads and, if you are lucky, they will invite you in. Sometimes, they come up with stories you can create with them, sometimes, they make stories you can manipulate on your own.
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