September 19, 2014   230,125 notes
allhailcloudyglow:

suddenlyoranges:

epser:

​no one will ever judge me for scrolling past things again

Thank you immunity cat

immunity cat gives good omens

allhailcloudyglow:

suddenlyoranges:

epser:

​no one will ever judge me for scrolling past things again

Thank you immunity cat

immunity cat gives good omens

(Source: deadrunespark, via odd-superbia)

September 18, 2014   1,596 notes
September 18, 2014

Challenge #00620 - A255: Know Your Source

Step 1: Take your left hand or grasping appendage.

Step 2: Reach your left hand or grasping appendage and move it so it is behind you.

Step 3: Lower your left hand or grasping appendage so that it is perpendicular to your pelvis.

Step 4: Move your left hand or grasping appendage towards your body, so that it contacts the rear of your pelvis.

Step 5: Grasp the rear of your pelvis.

Step 6: Lift.

Congratulations, you are now flying by the seat of your pants.

There was an irate saurian in the foyer. And, judging by the copious bags at hir feet, they were prepared to wait until someone in charge could see them.

The gatekeeper-secretary tidied his hair before discreetly calling their ultimate superior. Editor in Chief, Sanja Elkrun.

"Sir," murmured the secretary. "We have a camper in the foyer. They want to see you."

"How many bags?"

"I’ve counted six."

Sigh. “Well, at least it isn’t lawyers.” Editor Elkrun cut the comms. There was a twenty-minute window upcoming in her schedule that she usually reserved for window-time, but her psychological wellbeing had evidently been trumped, today.

She stepped smartly into her executive veet and pretended normalcy after the vertiginous drop to the ground floor. Even at max boost, there was not much time. Sanja left the veet talking. “Welcome, cogniscent, to the offices of MegaMagazines. I am Editor in Chief, Sanja Elkrun. I do not have much time, so please keep this quick.”

The saurian stood, revealing herself to be a female Enkapha. “I am Ligath. I came in protest to your instructions on page one five three of Human Comedy.”

"Sir…" said Sanja kindly. "The title of the publication is Human Comedy. We have disclaimers and warnings in pop-ups that you must read and acknowledge.”

"Oh, I had those turned off. They’re far too annoying."

Once again, the forces of ignorance trumped the desperate attempts of the virtuous to help them remain educated. “And the title of Human Comedy didn’t tell you that any instructions in the main body of the magazine are not to be taken seriously?”

Great Powers, she could actually see the righteous indignation in Ligath’s posture drain out of her. “Uh. Er. When you put it that way…”

"Do you consent to having this event become material for our magazine?" asked Sanja. "You have had warnings turned off, so I must ask if you read the disclaimer at the door." The disclaimer that plainly stated in GalStand and the five leading languages of the Galactic Alliance that people coming inside the offices to complain quickly became grist for the magazine mill, and entering was tantamount to consent.

"What? No!"

"Then in future, I suggest that you leave your warnings on," she said. "For your continued wellbeing." She turned away and strode back to her executive veet.

Sanja got all the way past the four hundredth floor before she burst out laughing.

[Muse food remaining: 18. Submit a promptAsk a questionBuy my stories!]

September 18, 2014   5 notes

internutter:

internutter:

I can’t art. It’s obvious.

Alas, I also lack the resources to purchase pro-level art for a book that will never pay me back.

My usual design consultant [aka best-beloved SO] is too busy to help me before the October 4 publication date.

So. Speaking as someone who lacks design skills to everyone who actually has them: What do I need to do to make this cover look cool?

My goal is simple, but slightly “off”. Like a Penguin Classics cover from an alternate dimension. You remember how they had the title and some old etching art with a crappy colourisation job on the cover? Something like that, with a hint of eldritch.

That’s why I put the shadow effects on the title, to make it look like it was about to float away from the cover.

As always, I insist that my name is in a smaller font size than the title.

Hints and tips appreciated, peeps. Just remember I have limited Photoshop skills [I moebius’d the front wheel of the bike myself :D It took me five hours and fifteen goes.] so if you’re going to get technical, break it down to the For Dummies version :)

I wanted a title font that looked slightly unhinged. Better suggestions also appreciated. Thanks in advance for all your help.

What would you do to make this look cooler?

Rebaggling in the hope of some feedback on this thing.

(via internutter)

September 17, 2014
September 17, 2014

InterNutter answers an Ask: Luckers

This came to me via email:

Wanda the Unfortunate and ‘The Drongo’, are both luckers. Wanda is clumsy, the Drongo gets ‘Wonderful Ideas!” Both have the ability to fall into the Septic Tank and come up with valuables plastered over themselves. So, are they just two degrees of luckers? Wanda has two doses of clumsy, the Drongo seems to be immune to clumsy but not safe to be near. And what happens on places like Amalgam where population density ensures that luckers are bound to meet, are the very, very, careful lest they implode or is there some kind of anti-lucker person, thing or device to restrain them. One shudders to think of the Drongo Family Reunion get together. Muse Food? Mum.

Civilization as we know it has been trying to unriddle the Luck Gene ever since it’s discovery by the Vardians some three hundred years ago, subjective. [Relative time: plus five hundred years, minus eight hundred. One-way wormholes make for some interesting historical notation]

Possession of the Luck Gene is no guarantee of anything other than amazing synchronicity between ‘good’ fortune and ‘bad’ fortune. In the case of Wanda the Unfortunate, it manifested as personal bad luck resulting in good luck for everyone around her. For The Drongo [If you don’t know who The Drongo is, please purchase your copy of R.T.F.M and enjoy the mayhem] it’s a severe lack of thinking things through that results in long-term fortunes for his parent company. Gregor Elfhand possessed personal body-blindness and a lack of spatial awareness that resulted in a change in the path of history at a cost to his physical wholeness.

Being a Lucker is being on a sliding scale associated closely with the Catastrophe Curve. Sometimes the ‘bad luck’ splash zone is a solar system wide. Other times, it’s intensely personal. And it can be anywhere in-between. The same with the ‘good luck’ splash zone.

As you can imagine, the worst kind of Lucker is the ones who have a solar system sized ‘bad luck’ zone and an intensely personal ‘good luck’ zone. These unfortunate individuals are called ‘Jacks’ after the phrase, “Oh, you’re all right, Jack.” And are often painted as being selfish and self-centred as a result.

There is a Lucker registry and free Lucker testing for anyone who shows the signs of being one.

For the record, Hwell Barrow has been tested numerous times and cleared of all suspicion in each case.

Luckers of the wide splash zone kind generally wear a four-leaf-clover pin as a warning to others.

All attempts to breed for certain kinds of Luckers, and to engineer them, have failed. Mostly because two Luckers in the same room is generally a very, very bad idea.

The last deep-time colony to try a deliberate program to make a planet full of Luckers -New Fortune- vanished without a trace. It actually vanished. The star no longer exists, the planets are not there any more, and there’s no evidence that they ever did.

This may be proof that the Universe doesn’t believe in too much luck.

September 17, 2014   134,109 notes
ingrisalchemist:

volatile-duchess:

yearofthedreams:

actuallytroybolton:

heartbroken-vinyl-scratch:

iwashi-tozoku:

thatsjustprime:

lilnepetaleijon:

:33 < i did both beclaws whatefur idk

welp
reblogging

what if you say it “tum-bluh”

TUMBLR

WhO SAYS TUMBLAH

TUMBLAH?

one of the first posts i ever reblogged

tumblah, really?

ingrisalchemist:

volatile-duchess:

yearofthedreams:

actuallytroybolton:

heartbroken-vinyl-scratch:

iwashi-tozoku:

thatsjustprime:

lilnepetaleijon:

:33 < i did both beclaws whatefur idk

welp

reblogging

what if you say it “tum-bluh”

TUMBLR

WhO SAYS TUMBLAH

TUMBLAH?

one of the first posts i ever reblogged

tumblah, really?

(Source: turkish-delights, via lady-dragonfyre)

September 17, 2014

Challenge #00619 - A254: A Cunning Plan…

"Don’t worry. It’ll all go according to plan," I reassured her that my plan was flawless.

Now I just needed to come up with one.

Rule one of coming up with a plan: work with what you’ve got. In this case, two rubber bands and a paperclip, and the clothes she stood up in if she was really that desperate.

Rule two: The environment is also what you’ve got. Nigh-seamless corridors made out of something that conserved energy by putting it back into the thing that hit it. One ricochet could, theoretically, wipe out the entire ship.

Alouette got a wicked smirk as she removed the rubber bands from her wrists and reconfigured the paperclip. “Did you know that there are reasons why they’ve successfully banned projectile weapons in space?” she said conversationally.

"What?" Princess Gaart made the universal what-the-hell-is-this human-doing face. "Everyone knows this…"

Alouette strung the rubber bands between her index and pinkie finger and gave the enemy the Devil Sign as she drew back her missile. “When I say ‘duck’…” she warned. Aloud, to the aliens, “I have a projectile weapon and I’m not afraid to use it!” She drew back the adjusted paperclip.

"Listen to the human," shrieked Princess Gaart. "They’re level four Deathworlders!"

It was the first time she’d bluffed her way out of a pickle with a weapon that might just actually work for a change. And possibly the first time anyone had threatened anyone else with a paperclip.

Rule three: It’s not a dense idea if it actually works.

[Muse food remaining: 18. Submit a promptAsk a questionBuy my stories!]

September 17, 2014   5 notes

internutter:

internutter:

I can’t art. It’s obvious.

Alas, I also lack the resources to purchase pro-level art for a book that will never pay me back.

My usual design consultant [aka best-beloved SO] is too busy to help me before the October 4 publication date.

So. Speaking as someone who lacks design skills to everyone who actually has them: What do I need to do to make this cover look cool?

My goal is simple, but slightly “off”. Like a Penguin Classics cover from an alternate dimension. You remember how they had the title and some old etching art with a crappy colourisation job on the cover? Something like that, with a hint of eldritch.

That’s why I put the shadow effects on the title, to make it look like it was about to float away from the cover.

As always, I insist that my name is in a smaller font size than the title.

Hints and tips appreciated, peeps. Just remember I have limited Photoshop skills [I moebius’d the front wheel of the bike myself :D It took me five hours and fifteen goes.] so if you’re going to get technical, break it down to the For Dummies version :)

I wanted a title font that looked slightly unhinged. Better suggestions also appreciated. Thanks in advance for all your help.

What would you do to make this look cooler?

Rebaggling in the hope of some feedback on this thing.

September 16, 2014   5 notes

internutter:

I can’t art. It’s obvious.

Alas, I also lack the resources to purchase pro-level art for a book that will never pay me back.

My usual design consultant [aka best-beloved SO] is too busy to help me before the October 4 publication date.

So. Speaking as someone who lacks design skills to everyone who actually has them: What do I need to do to make this cover look cool?

My goal is simple, but slightly “off”. Like a Penguin Classics cover from an alternate dimension. You remember how they had the title and some old etching art with a crappy colourisation job on the cover? Something like that, with a hint of eldritch.

That’s why I put the shadow effects on the title, to make it look like it was about to float away from the cover.

As always, I insist that my name is in a smaller font size than the title.

Hints and tips appreciated, peeps. Just remember I have limited Photoshop skills [I moebius’d the front wheel of the bike myself :D It took me five hours and fifteen goes.] so if you’re going to get technical, break it down to the For Dummies version :)

I wanted a title font that looked slightly unhinged. Better suggestions also appreciated. Thanks in advance for all your help.

What would you do to make this look cooler?

Rebaggling in the hope of some feedback on this thing.